This is a biggie.
I'm an RE teacher, so even thinking this feels like some form of heresy.
But, this is what I believe is at the heart of our 'problems' as humans.
• why do I feel like this?
• why did they do that?
• why won't they sleep?
• why is there so much traffic?
• why are we arguing so much?
• why am I so crap at that?
I think our inquisitiveness as humans had led to ALL sorts of over-thinking, worrying and speculating on things we can do very little to change. Because we really can't do anything about other people or situations.
The 'why' doesn't matter. The event is almost always in the past. A second ago, a year ago....it doesn't matter, it's gone.
History doesn't repeat itself. We do learn. It might look like the same, but everything about it is different.
Every moment is completely different.
Every time we try to solve a 'problem' or spend ages wondering what the best course of action might be, is a moment caught up in our heads.
Instead of being right here, right now.
I do it ALL the time. And it's okay to do it. We're all human.
But understanding that 'why' isn't always necessary....that it isn't our default...that it doesn't have to be the go-to...how does that feel?
Case in point...I spent 45 minutes 'debating' with my husband as to why I felt a bit shit and why he wasn't getting it and why he hadn't done what I'd asked him to and why he didn't understand me and why we're on different pages and blah blah blah.
None of it helped.
We had different points of view. We're both human but we see the world slightly differently. As we all do.
We went round in circles...'but I don't understand WHY you're being like this'.
And after if got off the phone, it suddenly dawned on me that it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter why.
It just is.
We just think what we think. We just feel what we feel.
We just do what we do.
And when we realise that EVERYONE is thinking, feeling and doing in exactly the same way, suddenly, our differences start to fall away.
And we can see that we're all completely connected. Completely the same. All just as we are. Perfect, whole and kind souls underneath it all.